27) “Let’s talk about sex, baby.” Part two.

Hi there girls and boys, I hope you’re well.

Part two of the post, and many thanks for the feedback on the first.

What type of girl do I like? I don’t really have a type. One day I can go for the supermarket checkout girl, the next some model on the net. I do prefer the slimmer woman, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with the larger lady. Labour ex-mp Laura Pidcock..wow. Small boobs are wonderful but if they are shapely then larger versions are more than acceptable. My own are a perky 34c at least for now, although who knows what gravity will do to them in the future? A good sports bra is a must. Boobs with implants though? Some can be seamless. Claire, the friend I was camping with, has the most natural looking boobs, yet they are plastic. They feel incredibly real, and you can be sure that this lesbian took the opportunity to have a good look and in depth perusal, via the medium of a realllly good caress, of a hetero girls boobs at her invitation. But they did cost £5000. That’s five…thousand…pounds.

Then there the types that look like they’ve been stuck on with glue. Why? Were they the absolute best type in the boob-enhancing catalogue? They typically show no change when the owner is either standing up or lying down. Madness. Yes they might look good under a tight t-shirt, but keep it on. I have fantasy girls but that’s just fantasy. A nice smile goes a looong way with me, nice arse, nice hair, nice eyes..all good. This video interested me greatly at age ten and I didn’t know why, but looking back… That gold top, AND I till like the cheesy tune.

As Abby and Ellie are my best friends we share everything sexually. I don’t mind if they want to have a night together, nor do they with me. Of course all three of us is a nice way to spend a weekend as well. I’m extremely lucky to have this, and can’t imagine how some shyer people manage, locked forever in that loop of not asking that someone out, as it might jeopardise the relationship they have with that person, but then not knowing if they would have said yes, then not asking again… I really feel for them. The girl or boy that thinks they are ugly, (you’re not) those with no confidence, that have been abused or beaten so can’t form a relationship. I’m always here for an online hug. I shy away from prolonged discussion about relationships though, both online as in real life. You’ll find telephone numbers for some people that may help here.

What is the best sex I’ve had? This is difficult. If you want to separate just having sex from making love, then I was once in Leeds, spending a night there after a painfully boring conference. In the hotel there was a concierge and as I was checking in he mentioned that there were select men and women he could contact for personal services, massages, etc, if that was something I required? I took the number and thought a long time before ringing it, that damned shyness once again showing itself. I called Ellie, who as ever was just “Ooooh go for it baby but afterwards I need DETAILS!!”. The woman that answered the phone was quite possibly the most polite, efficient and funny person I’ve ever spoken to. After explaining that I’d not done this before she guided me through some options, emailing me details and images of the escorts as we spoke, telling me of each of the girl’s likes and dislikes, and enquiring about my own. Why I thought it acceptable to tell her of one of the the things that rings my bell louder than most, I don’t know. I was glad I did.

About an hour later, with my adrenaline through the roof, there was a knock on the door and there stood Olivia. She was about 50, gorgeous and set off my internal alarms, but in a good way! She’d been briefed about this being my first time with an escort, and made it as smooth as possible. What was booked for an hour turned into three, after her discovering that a few of my fantasies matched with hers. Absolute heaven. Her body was superb for 50 and I can only hope mine goes the same way! She insisted on taking the money only for the hour, although I did manage to slip the rest into her bag. Telling Ellie of that night made for yet another passionate evening, so yes, the best sex led to the best sex. Since then we had her stay the night here with us, her “nieces” enjoying it very very much.

Of course there has to be a downside to all of this. Have I had bad sex? The school of thought that there is no such thing as bad sex is plainly wrong. Being raped isn’t “fun”. Imaginary fantasy rape, maybe, but actual force had never appealed to me. This goes back to the post about the journey and the destination. Candlelight, showers, dirty talk, foreplay, the mind should be as entertained as much if not more than the body. On the very few occasions where it just wasn’t happening from being drunk, not into each other once that initial spark had gone, whatever, I’ve still always enjoyed it. I don’t need to come to be happy, just to see my partner come does it for me.

As far as kinks go, I hate to disappoint you, but I’m pretty vanilla I’m afraid. That online BDSM test that people do is a pile of shite. The physical thing, hurting someone, I can’t get into that, but I do have safe words as I believe everyone should have, Ellie’s being “harder, faster”, haha. Mine is “oxtail”, my fave type of soup, chosen I can’t ever see how that would get into a sexy situation! I prefer the mental side of it as far as being “out there”. The mind is an erotic tool that has no boundaries, whereas you may struggle finding someone to build you a giant soup tin in which to shag. “Oh you could..great! Yes and can you do it in a beefy variety..say…oxtail?”

I do have my own predilections. I like some sexual partners to have a younger way of dressing, perhaps that school uniform, terrible I know but as long as we’re of an age then it’s all fantasy. Then there are nurses, fuck I do like a nurse’s uniform..but why? Again, it’s the mind isn’t it? As I can’t abide pain you won’t be finding a dominatrix outfit in my wardrobe. I may enjoy a slight smack on the bum, but no paddles or whips. I do quite like being loosely tied up. A friend once told me to tie her up and do something really bad to her, so I did so, then took her purse and bought chips, just for me. No, that’s not true.

I bought fish as well.

Kinks abound and thank fuck! We’d be boring without them, but… squirrels? Some of the stories on Lush are wonderful. Some are just plain weird. One of them revolves around a bloke imagining he’s a were-squirrel. It’s not like you have to go searching for them either, the newer stories are right there on the page when you log in. To do the writer credit it may be a literary masterpiece. I’ve not read his story, as the furry stuff immediately puts me off. Each to their own though.

I was chatting to a person online and they said this.. “What is kinky though? Hard to define. What we both enjoy is considered kinky. Other kinks do nothing for me. We are who we are. Sexual desire is fluid and hard to categorise sometimes.” Precisely. Thanks to Sam for allowing me to use that.

Despite my vanilla-ness, like everybody I’ve experimented. I’m happy to do most things to a partner if thats what they want. The same girl that had asked me to tie her up had asked me for a while, and I mean for three years, to wee on her. It isn’t something I liked to think about. While my toilets are always spotless, I don’t like to have any interest in what goes down them. After much MUCH persuasion, and one night when there were four of us in the hotel room after a great day, I relented. She led me into the bathroom. As she lay down in the bath with me straddling her, my embarrassment growing, she was almost jumping with excitement. And you know what? Even though I just couldn’t let myself go at first and for maybe ten minutes, with her gently coaxing and masturbating under me, the look on her face and explosive orgasm when I did release was quite wonderful, so much so that I came massively as well. The two others watched, Ellie amazed but in excitement at her girlfriend doing something she had previously thought she hated. It’s been repeated a few times. Does this mean never say never?

Gentle sex is fantastic for me, I can literally do it all night and most of the next day, but I’m a fit girl so can indulge you if you’d like a tad more oomph. Ellie likes it a bit harder than I do and I’m more than happy to oblige her with a strappy. Some of the things she comes out with during this, it would make a crow blush! …No, I can’t tell you! She does love me to act as a burglar and then make me do her, in return for not calling the police. On one memorable occasion she had the phone in her hand, and had already dialled two of the three 9’s, (she likes a bit of realism), when by accident she pressed the third. Cue a call to say that absolutely nothing was wrong, no no it had been an accident. The police still visited though, and we had to explain why we had called, followed by a lecture on the perils of roleplaying too much! The female officer couldn’t stop laughing. Durham is a small city, and we’ve met since while I’ve been out shopping or whatever, at which she smiles and always stops for a chat. “Any burglaries?”, she’ll enquire. The temptation to ask her to attend a mock burglary whilst wearing her uniform, just to see Ellie’s face…

I love a lesbian seduction porn afternoon as well. As something to have on the tv in the background during sex it’s nice I find, particularly if the participants are acting out roles. Lezlove have delivered quite a few dvd’s here and they are all superb. To watch two or more girls just let themselves be lost in the moment, ooh please. And yes I appreciate that they’re mostly acting, but a squirt can’t be faked easily. Anyway, I’m more about the beginning, a hand stealing it’s way to a pair of white knicks, their owner panting no…no… Does it for me every time. Then again. And again. Can I say that I find supposed familial relationships in these dvd’s extremely arousing? To hear one of them say something like, “Are you sure you should be doing this to me….?” can be so erotic I just can’t contain myself. It’s a thing I’ve experimented with a lot.

I mentioned watching girls earlier. January the 1st was Ellie’s birthday, and the disappointment of her not being able to travel here to celebrate it was huge, due to the virus. However, we have to get over such things, and so I planned to give her a present to remember. Her flatmate seems never to leave the place, being an part-time teacher, full time layabout. The chances to engage in a bit of Skype related fun are few and far between. As I’m alone I can do what I want to the screen, but Ellie has to just watch quietly as she lives in an apartment with thin walls. Well she doesn’t HAVE to be quiet, but you know what I mean. “Off to have a fingering session, I’ll be making some noise” might not go down too well with her flatmate, what with her being a Christian, “Jesus Saves” and “No to Gays” placards everywhere type. She tells Ellie that female gays are ok though. Phew, that’s a relief. Somebody 4000 miles away thinking that I couldn’t have a girlfriend would have kept me awake at nights! I’ve said hello to her via Skype. Her arse looked superb as it wiggled away from the cam on Ellie’s lappie, me mouthing “FUCK ME look at THAT” to the screen. Sadly I’m told that her personality is very bad, as is her hygiene. A shower once every three days? Shudder.

So the news that her flatmate was going home for the holidays was great! She was also seen on the tv news of the disgraceful attacks on the US Senate. Good luck with that teaching job.

I’d arranged our usual weekly video meeting for later that night, but this time using Zoom. Abby arrived and we set about getting a good angle for a bed show. Quite why we hadn’t done this together before, we didn’t know. They say that the best inventions are discovered in times of need. Then we made a discovery. If you have multiple devices logged into one account on the network, Zoom treats them all as different cameras, so the end viewer can see multiple views! Cue a rearranging of bedroom furniture to enable the Mac on one side of the bed, the lappie on the other, and Abby’s phone on top of the wardrobe, looking down on us. I can’t say I wasn’t already damp with the anticipation.

Ellie called expecting to see just me, but we were both sitting on the edge of the bed, me in my mock school outfit, and Abby in her mock barrister’s. Four hours of instruction later and totally satisfied, we said goodbye, Ellie telling us that was maybe the best present for years. Again, it was raised why we’d not done this before. It certainly won’t be the last time we do. Tired but feeling fucking wonderful, Abby and I stripped the bed, as well as the essential rubber sheet we’d thought to place under the cotton one, and then found that we did indeed have the energy to have a little bit more fun and a bath thrown in. Abby stayed the night, the next day parts of our bodies telling us that perhaps we shouldn’t be doing that again for a few weeks!

And before you ask, NO, you can’t have my login details!

As ever, thanks for reading.



31st of January, 2021


2 thoughts on “27) “Let’s talk about sex, baby.” Part two.”

  1. A bit winded but absolutely lovely insight. Perhaps a bit of rambling? A lot of rambling?!! LOL It’s quite ok, my girl. I love your words, dear. Keep up the good work. Love learning more all the time.

    Liked by 1 person

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